Meal Time! #5: TCDroogsma at World Street Kitchen

Come on over tonight, come on over this morning...

Well hello again, our hungry friends!

Welcome back to our restaurant review column Meal Time! (it's supposed to be read like Mail Time! from Pardon The Interruption.  Get it?  Not sports fans?  That's cool.).  It's been quite a while since we sent old TCDroogsma out into the world to eat some food, but this week we managed to scrub him clean and send him on his way down Lyndale to check out World Street Kitchen.

Droogsy, what'd you think?

Well hey there, everybody.  It's been quite some time since I was tasked with sitting down and writing one of these food reviews.  As you can probably imagine, I've eaten many a meal since I last sat down to chat with you, I just haven't written about them.

Anyway, Newest Industry asked me to get back on my meal time grind, so I thought I'd take stroll down to 27th & Lyndale and check out World Street Kitchen.  Word on the street is that they have pretty solid vegan food.  They're also known for staying open late and trying to loosen the stranglehold Pizza Luce & Caffrey's have held on post-drunky time meals for years.

Now, seeing as how I'm pretty much incapable of staying awake past 7:30 at night I figured it would be best if I took stopped by for lunch on my day off.  Like a damn fool, I showed up at about 2:30, a half an hour before happy hour starts.  I'm, uh... I'm not a smart man.  I was, however, a hungry, non-hungover man, only half of which is typical on a Tuesday afternoon.

(Pro Tip #1:  Don't show up 30 minutes before happy hour. Droogs did that, so hopefully you won't have to go through that.)

Admittedly, I didn't know quite what to expect from World Street Kitchen.  Is this a place like Luce's where you sit down and order from a server?  Is it like Caffrey's where you order and stand around waiting while people make your food and give you sideways glances like you're an asshole?  Was it some sort of hybrid ala Bad Waitress?

Well, turns out you walk in, glance at the big, McDonald's-esque menu, order, and take a number & a seat.

Now, I'll be honest, I did have a look at World Street Kitchen's menu online before I stopped in.  As a vegan, this is a crucial move with any restaurant.  After giving it a look I came to the conclusion that I was going to give the "Bangkok Burrito w/Marinate Tofu" a go.

I should point out one quick thing before I proceed: I don't like burritos.  My generation has made it seem like burritos are nature's perfect food and frankly, I couldn't disagree more.  Burritos are the meal time equivalent of communism.  All parts are created equal, distributed equally, and wrapped in a tortilla for flavor-mixing convenience (fuck those bourgeois forks!). On paper, it seems like a brilliant idea.

However, to quote the philosopher Homer Simpson, "In theory, communism works. In theory." Much like applied communism, burritos don't work.  That theoretical "equal parts flavor explosion" doesn't exist.  Instead, you get one bite of lettuce, one bite of tofu, one bite of salsa, etc... If we've learned nothing from the work of George Orwell, it's that all parts may be created equal, but some are more equal than others.  The tortilla typically falls apart, spilling the proletariat ingredients everywhere and requiring the iron-fist rule of a wrapper to keep the whole thing together.  To put it bluntly, burritos suck.

So, with all that in mind, World Street Kitchen was looking at an uphill battle to win me over with this Bangkok Burrito.

Anyway, I sauntered up to the cash register, ordered my Bangkok Burrito.  Figuring that the burrito needed all the help it could get in this review, I also ordered a Grain Belt.  Sure, it was 2:30 on a Tuesday and I'd only been awake for 4 hours.  It was my day off.  Fuck you.

I was given my order number:

22! Clutterbuck status!

Well, I took my number and found a seat.  As you can see, the place was not particularly jumpin'.  Looks like I'm the only one who missed out on the "Happy Hour Starts At 3" memo.  As always, I'm an idiot.

Fortunately, the booze gods were feeling generous this Tuesday afternoon.  Moments after I sat down my cashier came over to inform me that the Grain Belt keg was empty and, "Would you like to have a different beer instead?"  Summit Saga it is!

(Pro Tip #2: Order the cheap beer on the days the keg is empty.  You will then be upgraded to more delicious beer for free.  Admittedly, this is a tough trick to pull off.  This is why I get paid the big bucks people.)




Anyway, I'm hungry. Let's do this:

(Cue the horns)

Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you the Bangkok Burrito with Marinated Tofu!

So here's the story so far:

Location: World Street Kitchen at 27th & Lyndale
Time Of The Day: 2:30 in the afternoon
Level Of Sobriety: Total, but trending downward
Dirty Player Status: Clutterbuck hits clean! Not like your team's grinders!
Meal: Bangkok Burrito with Marinated Tofu
To The Side: Nothing, no one, nothing around for miles
Beverage: Summit Saga at Grain Belt prices
Menu Price: Burrito: $8.00, Beer: $5.00
Total Price w/Tip: $14.00

Upon initial presentation, I was underwhelmed (if that's a word).  I mean, we can all agree that utensils are the tools of capitalist pigs, but could a dude at least get a plate?  This ain't a damn county fair!

Anyway, I unwrapped the foil of the oppressors and gave this thing a taste.  First impression, kind of bland but not bad.  The cooks did a very nice job of getting the tofu to have a nice, crispy outside and a chewy inside.  Wisely, the burrito consists of little besides rice, tofu, a bit of greens, and a pretty mild coconut curry sauce.


The burrito held its structure nicely as I worked my way through and the burrito was assembled in such a manner that I was actually able to get equal parts tofu, rice, and greens with each bite.  Good work by the folks behind the counter to solve one of the larger burrito problems (mixing all the flavors together) by conceding a smaller problem (not very many ingredients).



About three quarters of the way through this thing I found myself less full as much as I was bored.  It was OK, but the lack of flavor made the burrito seems like a bit of an endurance test.  However, I managed to put the whole thing down like a fuckin' champ.  I didn't pay non-happy hour prices for a burrito to not eat it all.

Now, considering that the burrito was almost exclusively rice & tofu, it wasn't the most filling thing in the world.  In hindsight, coming away with a more filling beer (Summit Saga) rather than Grain Belt turned out to be a godsend as it made the whole meal significantly more filling than it would have been had my order been presented properly.

So that's the meal.  Let's break this thing down:

Flavor: 5/10 - By making the aforementioned trade-off, the burrito bets heavily on the coconut curry flavor.  I'd call that bet a push.  It's pretty delicious, but a bit too subtle to be exciting.

Filling: 8/10 - As I mentioned, part of this was the beer choice, but this meal did turn out to be pretty filling.  Of course, for $14 it better be.

Price: 5/10 - Considering a burrito of comparable size, Chipotle's veggie burrito is cheaper and contains more ingredients.  None of those ingredients, however, are as awesome as marinated tofu.  Trading out the salsa/guac mix for marinated tofu & coconut curry is definitely worth $1.25.

Ambiance: 4/10 - The place has that oddly sterile, bare beams & metal look that screams "Hipster focus group."  The music was much the same, with T. Rex, dubstep, & Hot Chip all making high-volume appearances during my visit.  Still, the place was spacious with booths, a bar, and individual tables.  I could definitely see this working well as a drunky meal spot.

Service: 8/10 - There wasn't a huge amount of interaction, but the woman at the cash register was quite pleasant and seemed genuinely apologetic for running out of Grain Belt and forcing my beer upgrade.  I call that a win.

What Type Of Communism Is This Burrito?: Definitely the Swedish style.  It's bland, filling, & efficient.  If this had been the Russian type of communism the burrito would have had too many ingredients, less satisfying taste, a ruthless wrapper.

How Many Times Would I Eat This Meal Per Month?: Straight sober at 3 in the afternoon: Once.  Round midnight after 3 or 4 brandy gingers at the CC Club: As often as I drank 3 or 4 brandy gingers at the CC Club round midnight.

Final Score: 6/10 - All things considered my World Street Kitchen experience was pleasant against tough odds.  Leaning heavily on beer & tofu is almost always going to lead to a better-than-average experience.  I definitely came away from the meal thinking that 2:30 in the afternoon is not their money making time. On a Friday or Saturday night when the place has a bit more energy and a few more people I'll bet it's a great time.  Next time you're drinking on Lyndale you should consider skipping Caffrey's & Luce's for a night and give it a try.

Well there you have it, food fans! An efficient meal reviewed and filed away!

For more World Street Kitchen check out their website here.

For more TCDroogsma be sure to give him a follow on Twitter (@TCDroogsma).  He can also be found right here on Newest Industry hosting our free weekly podcast Flatbasset Radio.

For more Newest Industry be sure to give us a follow on Twitter (@NewestIndustry1) to stay up on the work being done by all of our contributors.  More importantly, we have a Facebook page here.  Trivial as it seems, stopping by and giving us a "Like" is a free & legit way to support the blog.

 

Meal Time !#2: TCDroogsma at Ping's Szechuan Bar & Grill

Oh, we got Ping...

Oh, hello again my hungry friends. It was getting a little late Sunday night and I was tired, hungry, and a little drunk. So I decided to take a stroll down to the neighborhood Chinese spot, Ping's Szechuan Bar & Grill (which will be shortened to just 'Ping's' for the rest of this post).

If you're unfamiliar with Ping's, it is somewhat of a staple in the Stevens/Nicollet Mall community. It's located at 1401 Nicollet, just at the southern edge of Nicollet Mall.  Check their website here for more info.

I've been there once or twice before and I honestly have no idea how this place makes enough money to stay open. I turned up around 8 and this is what the place looked like.

As you can see, it was a packed house. Big ups to the 18 for photobombing this shot though. Score another one for Metro Transit. I mean, do you know how big a bus is?!?  Timing is everything in life.

I came to the conclusion that Ping's must make all it's money with their lunch buffet.  I could totally see some Target Whore-porate (copyright: SwervinTaters) employees deciding to stroll down the mall and stuff their sexy faces with crab legs and lo mein noodles before heading back downtown and working on new ways to get a little dog to sell me socks.

So, as is my style, I posted up at the bar, which was equally bustling.

Outside of the ghost drinker, I pretty much had the place to myself.  Although I was a bit skeptical of that shady guy sitting by the window.  Come find out, son. Come find out.

Of course, there are a couple of regulars at Ping's.

 Damn! Koi fish like a motherfucker!

So, what to get?  Admittedly, I was craving some tofu, but all the tofu dishes on the menu had that stupid little pepper next to them indicating 'spicy.'  If you didn't know, I have the spice tolerance of a toddler who was raised on grapes & Enfamil.  However, there was one tofu dish on the menu that didn't have the pepper next to it:

(Cue the horns)

I present to you: Ping's Sesame Glazed Fried Tofu!

That's right!  A second straight Meal Time! featuring tofu & sesame seeds!  I didn't even plan this shit!  It's possible that I secretly love sesame seeds and don't even know it.

So, here's where we're at:

Location: Ping's
Time Of Day: 8:00 Sunday night
Ambiance: Non-existent, save for the Olympics on mute and stereotypical Chinese restaurant music
Level Of Sobriety: Medium
Level Of Energy: Like a cat in a sun room
Meal: Sesame Glazed Fried Tofu
Main Ingredient: Tofu
To The Side: White rice
Beverage: Tsingtao
Menu Price: $10.95 American for the tofu/rice. $5 American for the Tsingtao.
Total Price: $18 American (w/tip)

As you could imagine, I was pretty fucking psyched to see that small mountain of tofu sitting in front of me.  However, my enthusiasm was short-lived since, as you can see by the picture, there is not a vegetable to be found. Not a one.  I mean, I would've been pretty pissed off if there were mushrooms involved, but some onions or green peppers would've been nice.  Or better yet, broccoli.  Although adding broccoli almost certainly would've bumped up the price another $1.50 American since, as we all know, broccoli has the highest IQ of any vegetable.

I decided to have a Tsingtao with this meal because, well, when in Rome, etc...

(Pro Tip #1: Don't get Tsingtao. If you want to know why the Chinese are so ruthlessly efficient, look no further than this beer. You'd have to drink something like 30 of these things to get a buzz.)

As the picture above shows, the tofu cubes were large. In fact, I actually cut a couple of them in half. They were also cooked perfectly, with the outside being nice & crisp and the innards chewy.  When I find myself craving tofu, I'm craving that kind of texture.  Well played, Ping's.

Unlike the B-LB scramble (where I couldn't figure out why the sesame seeds were involved), the sesame seeds actually provided a nice little kick to the tofu.  Crunchy seeds + crunchy outer tofu + chewy inner tofu = delicious.  I'm coining the phrase 'Ping's Theorem' for that equation.

However, since there are not vegetables, the deliciousness of this meal hinged almost entirely on the sesame glaze.  Let me tell you, it just didn't pass the test.  Unlike the typical 'brown sauce' that's found at most Chinese restaurants, this glaze didn't appear to contain any garlic to balance out the sweetness.  I mean, after five or six cubes, the glaze was just overwhelming.  I'm talking Mandy-Moore-Fronting-The-Lightning-Seeds levels of sweetness.  Frankly, it's just too damn much.

I managed to get through about half the mountain of tofu before I hit the wall.  As I've mentioned before, tofu is not particularly filling and this held true at Ping's.  Unfortunately, the glaze was just so fucking sweet that I thought my thyroid was going to come out of my throat and push the plate off the table.  I boxed up what was left, finished my beer, and headed home.

(Pro Tip #2:  We all know that nobody can go more than 90 minutes without digging into their Chinese food leftovers.  This is a two-way street with tofu, as the longer it sits in the fridge the more the flavor is absorbed by the cubes.  With a meal like this one it's important to go home, maybe drink some water, and then finish it off when the hunger hits.  If this sits in the fridge all night the tofu will absorb every last bit of that sugary glaze and you'll basically be eating cubed diabetes for lunch the next day.)

All things considered, this was not an un-delicious meal.  It was a disappointing one though.  This plate of tofu seems like it would be fantastic as a shared appetizer for a group of three or four people, but I'm just one man.  It's just overwhelming.

Let's break this thing down:

Flavor: 4/10 - Initially delicious, but much like sex that goes on longer than 45 minutes, it just had to stop.

Filling: 3/10 - Tofu just isn't filling.  Anytime you have to stop eating a meal for a reason other than a full belly, you're probably getting a low 'filling' score.

Price: 2/10 - I paid $18 American for this?!?  I mean, I could've picked a better beer.  That's on me.  But $10.95 American for the type of tofu I could get at any shitty wok in MPLS.... sorry, Ping's.  That's just not happening.

Ambiance: 7/10 - I suppose this ranking depends on how you feel about people.  As I dislike pretty much all people, I'm bumping it up.  Since I also like sports on television, it gets a 7.  Admittedly, though, it is a little odd sitting in that big restaurant with nothing but smug fish & servers looking at you while you eat.  And that one guy.  Fuck that guy.

Service: 10/10 - I dealt exclusively with the bartender called Spencer.  Spencer has clearly been doing playing this game for a long time.  He was super prompt (though, again, I was the only person there), friendly, chatty, and mildly handsome in an ugly sort of way (like David Schwimmer).  Frreal, this guy's killin' it.

If This Meal Was A Simpsons Character It Would Be: Nelson Muntz.  Nice when deployed in the right setting (i.e. appetizer for a large group), but far too one-dimensional to carry a whole episode (or meal).

How Many Times Would I Eat This Per Month If I Could Afford To: Zero. Sorry, Spencer.  It's not your fault.

Overall Score: 3/10 - Just not getting the job done as a meal.  I think I spent the night sweating out that glaze.  $18 American to sweat out a meal is unreasonable.  It just is.

That's that.  I'll leave you with this:  I was given two fortune cookies at the end of the night.  I was not with anybody else.

First of all, cookies, I'm a chronic procrastinator. It's never a good time to finish up old task.  Second, if you're willing to classify student loan officers as 'fortune hunters,' then yeah, you kinda nailed that one, thanks for reminding me. Smart ass cookie...

For more TCDroogsma, he can be found on Twitter (@TCDroogsma).  He also maintains his own blog, Caffeine & Obscenities which you should check out if you've finished up reading every other thing on the internet.

Of course, this blog can be found on Twitter as well (@NewestIndustry1) and we now have our own Facebook page here.  If you dig what we do check it out and give it a like.  I mean, we like you, y'know? Fair is fair.

Meal Time!#1: TCDroogsma at Bryant-Lake Bowl

TCDroogsma likes to eat things. He also likes to write blogs. Here we go...

Hey internets! How ya'll doing? Well? Yeah? Good. You know I worry about you.

As you can see, I took a walk down to the old Bryant-Lake Bowl the other day.  If you somehow don't know what B-LB is, well, get outside more. Christ.

B-LB is a bar/restaurant/old-timey bowling alley located, if you can believe this, on the corner of Bryant Ave. & Lake St. During the day it's very much a lunch spot and at night it becomes more of a date night/dj night/bowling night type of place. They have a theatre attached to the bar, but for our purposes, that's irrelevant (of course, if you're a fan of indie theatre and local bands, you should look into it).

Annnyyywayyy... I was hungry for breakfast yesterday (by breakfast I mean it was 2:00 in the afternoon but I hadn't eaten yet). Thanks to my old friend SwervinTaters, I remembered that B-LB actually has breakfast until 3 and that it's pretty solid. When I got there at 2:30, I had just missed the lunch rush, so I was working with this:

As you can see, with the exception of the server who was moving faster than my shutter speed, I pretty much had the run of the place. Though, oddly, the bowling lanes were mostly full. Who's bowling on at 2:30 on a Tuesday afternoon?

So, here's what we're dealing with. Here's the rundown.

Location: Bryant-Lake Bowl
Meal: Tofu Scramble
Main Ingredients: Tofu, Tamari, Spinach, Red Pepper, Onion, Seasame Seeds, Tamari
To The Side: B-LB Fries or Dirty Rice (cooked in canola oil), a variety of toast options
Beverage: Water
Seated: At The Bar
Music: The Current
Menu Price: $7:50 American for the scramble/sides, $0 for the water
Total Price: $10 American (w/tip)

(Cue the horns)

I present to you the Bryant-Lake Bowl Tofu Scramble!

As you can see, unlike the restaurant's very literal name, the Tofu Scramble does not actually feature scrambled tofu. The tofu is cubed and mixed in with the spinach, onion, red pepper & mixed all together with the tamari and sesame seeds.

The home fries have the texture and consistency of thin-cut potato chips.

(Pro Tip #1: Mix the tofu/veggie combo with the home fries and let it all sit for a minute or two. This lets the potatoes absorb some of the tahini and soften them up. Otherwise you're just eating potato chips with a fork, or as I like to call it, Chinese Potato Chip Fork Torture.)

Also, I went with the sourdough as my toast of choice because, as Congress declared back in the mid-90's, sourdough bread is un-fuck-withable.

Anyway, once I let the mixture come together, this meal was a damn fine meal. The tofu is not very browned, so if you're put off by the texture of tofu, this may not be the meal for you. You should also grow the fuck up.

The red pepper was definitely still crisp, which is awesome. The onion gave the whole thing a nice little kick. Obviously the spinach does what spinach does, namely taste pretty good while making you feel like you're being relatively healthy. We all know it's easy to let spinach get too soggy, so, to their credit, the cooks did an awesome job of getting it done just right.

Not to channel the ghost of Mitch Hedberg, but I'd be lying if I said I knew exactly what role the sesame seeds play in the meal. That being said, they are not an unwelcome addition.

The tamari does not have a super-prominent role in the taste of the entire meal. This is clutch, as nobody wants to eat a breakfast that's so salty they're chugging glass of water after glass of water. It does pull everything together nicely though.

(Pro Tip #2: Since the toast is dry, save it for last. Eat up the delicious tofu/veggie/home fries mix and then use the toast to soak up what's left of the tamari & canola oil. This improves the meal by at least 15%)

So that's that. A very, very good breakfast. Let's tally up the final score.

Flavor: 8/10 - Mild, which is perfect for a breakfast that is one part delicious and one part hangover cure.

Filling: 6/10 - Good and greasy (though without actual grease). However, you'd have to eat a whole cart of tofu & veggies to actually get full.

Price: 6/10 - $10.00 total seems a bit steep for a meal that wasn't super filling and didn't have a beverage. However, that's the going rate these days. If it was any cheaper I'd probably be there 3 days a week.

Ambiance: 8/10 - Given my distaste for people, an empty bar was pretty solid. Plus, they played the new Blur single on The Current while I was there. Bonus point.

Service: 9/10 - Kristen & Brendan were working  behind the bar. Both were super-friendly and, I'm secure enough in my manhood to admit, very good looking. If you ask Kristen nicely she may even tell you about her bacon & cheese tattoo. Also, I apologize if I misspelled your names, Kristen & Brendan. Or Christin & Brendon. Or Kirstin & Brian.

If This Meal Was A Former Twins Outfielder It Would Be: Shannon Stewart. You tend to forget about it, but it's actually really good and deserves more credit than it gets.

How Many Times Per Month Would I Eat This Meal If I Could Afford To: 3. It certainly deserves a spot in the rotation. Roughly once every 10 days seems about right.

Overall Score: 7/10 - A better than average breakfast experience. Thanks, B-LB!

So there you have it, Twin Cities. The Tofu Scramble at the Bryant-Lake Bowl. Definitely worth checking out.

For more TCDroogsma you can follow him on Twitter (@TCDroogsma) or on his own blog Caffeine & Obscenities.

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