Well hello again, football fans! Welcome To Ten & Six's Week 7 kickoff!
It's been a long, sad, strange week here in the land of The Purple. Fortunately, we don't have to talk about that until Saturday. Tonight we get to sit back and watch two NFC West franchises kick the shit out of each other. The Seachickens are in the dry heat of Arizona and Mike Otto's here to kick off Week 7 with his pick.
Mikey, who takes the W?
Seattle (5-1) at Arizona (3-3)
Russell Wilson is a much different QB at home vs. on
the road, which is to be expected of a young QB in this league.
Much to
the chagrin of Cards fans everywhere, Carson Palmer is the same player
no matter where he goes. This guy would throw 1 TD and 2 INT's whether
he was in the middle of Sahara Desert or a cozy domed stadium. I can't
wait for Carson Palmer to retire. I'm sick of this same shit every year
with him, and I just don't know if I can do it anymore. I wonder if he
wakes up everyday and thinks, "Fuck, this again? What team do I play
for again? The Arizona Bengals? Where's Chad Johnson? Didn't he race a
horse last week?"
Good Lord. Same shit, different city, same result. Final Score:
Seattle Seahawks: 23 Arizona Cardinals: 13
There you have it, football fans! Seattle gets a Seahawks win and a new Pearl Jam album in the same week! It's a great time to be a 42 year old in the Pacific Northwest!
The Vikings plan on starting Josh Freeman in their Monday night showdown with the equally hapless Giants. Be sure to stop back Saturday
afternoon as Mike will be back to discuss all of this.
For more Mike Otto be sure to give him a follow on Twitter (@SwervinTaters). He can also be found right here on Newest Industry contributing to our Trendsetting column.
For more Newest Industry be sure to give us a follow on Twitter (@NewestIndustry1) to stay up on the work being done by all of our contributors. More importantly, we have a Facebook page here. Trivial as it seems, stopping by and giving us a "Like" is a free & legitimate way to support the blog.
Well hello again, football fans! Welcome back to Ten & Six!
After notching their first W of the season our beloved Minnesota Vikings were given the week off. It's been a exhausting four weeks for both the Vikings & our great Vikings mind Mike Otto. Before he takes a well-deserved weekend off, however, Mikey did swing by to give us his picks for the rest of the league.
There will be plenty of time to break down the Vikes big win in London next week, so Mikey, take it away!
Turns out jolly old London was a jolly old time for
the guys in purple!
The Vikings avoided another final minute defensive
collapse in order to secure their first win of the year. After Everson
Griffen toppled Big Ben for the final play of the game, the Wembley
speakers started blasting Princes "Purple Rain", which is just
fantastic, also, expect to hear from Prince about that one...flunkeys.
A
first win is a first win, but Jesus, they know how to make it close don't
they? I swear, the Vikings could make sorting socks interesting.
It's
the bye week for our favorite football team, and much like the guys in
purple, I'm going to take a week off. I don't know if you realize this,
but its a serious burden writing about how much Ponder sucks/trying to
sell Matt Cassel as a thing/finding anything positive to say about this
defense, and doing it every week.
Expect much more analysis of the
London game coming next week, along with a preview of a Vikings/Panthers
contest I'm already afraid of. Right now, I'm going to do what comes
easiest to me: taunting the other teams that play this week. Lets make
some picks!
My picks went 10-5 last week, and stand at 37-26 on the year. Not too shabby, but this week I'm striving for perfection.
New England (4-0) at Cincinnati (2-2)
Last week the Bengals lost the battle for Ohio, while
the Patriots put the Falcons season on life support.
Belichick loves
destroying hopes and dreams of the young and old, this is a known fact.
I'm pretty convinced Belichick takes a job as The Krampus in the
offseason.
If losing to the Browns didn't hurt enough (I know all too
well that it did), this week the Bengals will bumble and stumble through a
game against on of the NFL's best, getting completely dismantled in the
process. Pats win 28-17
Detroit (3-1) at Green Bay (1-2)
The Packers are 1-2. It felt good to write that.
Worth noting, they were 1-2 last year as well, but still won 11 games.
This year seems different to me.
This Packers team plays absolutely no
defense and this Lions offense is suddenly top 3 in the league with the
addition of former USC standout and Kim Kardashian cast-away, Reggie
Bush. Oh how sweet would it be to have the Packers sitting at 1-3?
They
don't lose many at Lambeau, and this may sound preposterous, but I think
the Lions are for real. Lions steal one from the dirty cheesers, 38-34
Seattle (4-0) at Indianapolis (3-1)
The Seahawks remained undefeated much thanks to Matt
Schaub once again choking in a big game scenario. Russell Wilson was
unimpressive through the air, but extended more than one drive with his
legs, the guy just always finds a way to get it done. He'll need a much
better week in the passing game if he wants to keep up with Andrew Luck
at home, I just don't think he's up to the task. Colts hand the 'Hawks
their 1st loss 23-20
Baltimore (2-2) at Miami (3-1)
The Ravens are a hard team to figure out this year.
One week they are dominating the Texans, the next they're losing to the
scrubby Bills. I don't care what their record is, the Bills suck.
Ryan
Tannehill came quickly back to Earth when put up against a QB like Drew
Brees. Tannehill kind of reminds me of a poor man's Joe Flacco, so I
think this is going to be a close one.
Rust belt Harbaugh might not be
as good as Gold Coast Harbaugh, but he is certainly better than America's
Wang Philbin. Ravens win 26-24
New Orleans (4-0) at Chicago (3-1)
The Saints are my favorite to win the Super Bowl as of
right now. That offense is firing on all cylinders and the defensive
woes of last season are a distant memory. They are creating turnovers
and forcing 3-&-Outs with ease.
It only took four weeks for Bad Jay
Cutler to make an appearance, which was a couple weeks sooner than I
thought he would show up. Jay was at his pass forcing-worst last week,
and the Bears only made it close against the Lions in garbage time. This
week Jay gets to see an actual elite NFL QB, and an actually
respectable human being, in Drew Brees. Fuck you, Jay Cutler. Saints win
31-21.
Philadelphia (1-3) at New York Giants (0-4)
Antrelle Rolle thinks the Giants can run the table
and finish 12-4. Surrrrre you can buddy. I don't think the Broncos would
trade Peyton for Eli, so there goes that theory.
I enjoy watching the
Giants flounder. I have a couple friends who are Giants fans, because, I
mean, you just can't escape these people. They're everywhere, and
thankfully, this year, I haven't heard much from them. No "greatest team
on earth in the greatest city blah blah blah," just peaceful silence
and serenity. A guy could get used to this. Eagles win 27-20.
Kansas City (4-0) at Tennessee (3-1)
The Jake Locker went down last week like an old lady
that just broke her hip and left her Life Alert button at home that
morning. Poor bastard, just when things were looking up for him his fine
crystal body suffered another crystal crack. Don't worry though, you've
got Ryan Fitzpatrick to the rescue! Just because he wasn't good enough
for the Bills doesn't mean he will completely derail your season in the
next 4-8 weeks. OK, maybe that's exactly what it means. Chiefs win easy
23-10.
Jacksonville (0-4) at St. Louis (1-3)
Alright Bradford, if you can't win this game, you
should probably just hang up the cleats.
The Jags are bad. Probably "0-16"
bad. Can anyone out there imagine a scenario in which the Jags win a
game this year? If so please forward said scenarios to Newest Industry's Facebook page. I'm all ears, Jags fan(s).
Seriously though, their best
chance was probably against the Raiders and that didn't turn out so
well. The only thing sadder than Maurice Jones-Drew's career in
Jacksonville is his resignation to said sadness. What a waste. Bradford makes this one closer than necessary, but the Rams win 17-13.
Carolina (1-2) at Arizona (2-2)
I wish Cam Newton and Larry Fitzgerald were on the
same team. Now you'd have something there. Right now the Panthers and
Cards have nothing and less than nothing, respectively.
Poor Larry. Such
a wasted prime. Carson Palmer is washed up. I think he might have been
born washed up.
I'm starting to question whether Cam Newton can get over
his inconsistencies as a quarterback. As long as Ron Rivera is around, I
don't feel good for his chances. Panthers win this one 27-14.
Denver (4-0) at Dallas (2-2)
Peyton Manning and the Denver Broncos look
unstoppable so far. They have faced no adversity and haven't had to play
from behind at all this year. It will be interesting to see how they
handle their first real challenge.
Unfortunately, their first real
challenge will have to wait for another week, as toe-stubbing
aficionados the Dallas Cowboys are their opponent on Sunday. The Cowboys are
the kings of self-inflicted wounds, led by shotgun-to-foot accident
waiting to happen, Tony Romo.
Romo and the 'Boys have no chance in this
one. Broncos win 38-24.
Houston (2-2) at San Francisco (2-2)
The Texans are going to throw this season away aren't
they? What a shame. You get the feeling that Matt Schaub could never
deliver a team a Super Bowl appearance, much less a "W" in the big game.
Colin Kaepernick got his team back on the right track last week, but it
had a lot more to do with Frank Gore turning back the clock five years with
a 150 yard performance. Kaepernick is struggling through a mini-
sophomore slump, but I think the home field advantage helps the Niners
to a win this week, 26-24.
San Diego (2-2) at Oakland (1-3)
Phillip Rivers has been playing really well so far
this year which can only mean one thing: the other shoe has yet to drop.
He can't keep it up, that's not the Phillip Rivers we all know and
love. I'm still holding out hope he grows that 'stache back. Those were
the deliciously dark days. Trust in the 'stache! The 'stache adds a
little zip on those spirals Philly.
I've decided that the Raiders will
probably never be good again. Rich Gannon isn't coming back, not without
a time machine. Chargers win easy 23-10.
New York Jets (2-2) at Atlanta (1-3)
The Falcons need to get healthy real bad. Lucky for
them they have the NFL's equivalent of a spoonful of Robitussin, the New
York Jets, coming to Atlanta this week. Lose to the Jets and they
should just let Tony Gonzalez retire. He thought he was going to the
Super Bowl this year. At this point he'll be lucky to play in a wild
card game. Oh well, I guess he'll just have to go home and sleep on his
pile of money. Falcons win 28-13.
There you have it, folks! No Vikings this weekend, but plenty of still plenty of other teams to laugh at. Be sure to check right back here on Thursday when Mikey kicks off Week 6 by firing shots at both the Giants and Bears.
For more Mike Otto be sure to give him a follow on Twitter (@SwervinTaters). He can also be found right here on Newest Industry contributing to our Trendsetting column.
For more Newest Industry be sure to give us a follow on Twitter (@NewestIndustry1) to stay up on the work being done by all of our contributors. More importantly, we have a Facebook page here. Trivial as it seems, stopping by and giving us a "Like" is a free & legitimate way to support the blog.
Well hello again, Vikings fans! It's been a little while since we've spoken with Mike about the Vikings, but the offseason officially starts tomorrow and the the Vikings jumped the gun today by dealing former Offensive Rookie Of The Year Percy Harvin to the Seattle Seahawks for a 1st round and 7th round pick in this year's draft and a 3rd round pick in next year's draft.
Obviously this qualifies as big news, so we asked Mike to take time out from his busy schedule of Trendsetting and providing Deadspin with jokes to send us his thoughts. Mike?
GOODBYE PERCY
As you may have heard, Percy Harvin was traded to the Seattle Seahawks
today for the 'Hawks 1st and 7th round picks in this years draft, as
well as a 3rd rounder next year. Not too shabby for a guy who was only
supposed to garner a second round pick at most.
This is the first time a wide receiver has garnered a first round pick
in a trade since March 2nd, 2005. Can you name that receiver? The one,
the only, Randy Gene Moss! Since then many big name receivers have been
traded with none garnering any more than a couple mid-round picks. Let's
hope this trade turns out a little better than the Moss fiasco in '05. I mean, I
know we all miss Napolean Harris, but let's hope we get more than what
the great Napolean brought to the table.
Lets break down just how Rick Spielman milked all this potential value
out of Percy, whether it was a good choice, and what the team should do
from here.
Whether you think it was a good choice or not, you have to admit it was
the best/only choice the Vikings had at this time. I equate the Percy
Harvin/Minnesota Vikings relationship to that of a bad marriage, one so
far fractured that the differences were irreconcilable, and separation
was best for both parties.
Percy was not going to play for the Vikings this year. He was angry
enough to waste an entire year of his prime in order to stick it to the
Vikings purely out of spite. In this scenario, the Vikings get nothing
for Harvin and look like a bunch of fucking morons in the process. Not
ideal.
I believe Harvin when he says it wasn't about the money. He just really
fucking dislikes Christian Ponder. In a perfect world, Harvin is still
in a Vikings uniform, but fact is you simply can't make someone want to
be here. Spielman and the Vikings got an insane amount of value for what
had become a problem to them. The Seahawks might have gotten the final
piece for a championship run. On paper, this trade was a win-win.
There is only one way Spielman pulled this off and it was a brilliant
play on his part. He created a market for Harvin where there was none at
the beginning of the offseason. How? He forced two fierce rivals into a
bidding war for the prized receiver/return man/running back. Keep in
mind this is only my speculation on what went down.
Spielman first contacts the San Francisco 49ers and says something along the lines of,
"Hey, you guys were almost there last year, how would you feel about
giving up your 1st round pick for a young, established talent in the
prime of his career?" This undoubtedly sounded like a dream scenario for
the Niners, I mean, after all, they aren't going to get a Percy Harvin
with the 31st overall pick in this years draft.
Spielman then contacts the Niners' fierce division rival, the Seattle
Seahawks and says, "Hey guys, the Niners are gonna give me this for
Harvin, and I'm gonna do it unless you can top it." So the Seahawks had
to ask themselves, who do we want Percy Harvin to play for, us or them?
Let the bidding begin! Like I said, brilliant.
Where to go from here? The possibilities are endless! They range from
the likely - picking up one of the free agents Amendola, Jennings or
Wallace while drafting 2-3 WR's this year, to the unlikely - packaging the two first-rounders for someone like Larry Fitzgerald.
I am sure of one thing, this is part of a bigger plan. It's come to
light that the Vikings were attempting to acquire Anquan Boldin before
the Niners traded for him (revenge trade?) and I'm fairly certain the
Purple will aggressively go after one of those big name free agents.
Overall, I'm satisfied with the trade as a fan, even if I am a little
sad. I'm sorry to see Harvin go. He was fun to watch and it hurts
whenever your team loses a versatile talent who is a former rookie of
the year. This is just the way it had to be. Harvin couldn't be a team
player, he couldn't fall in line, and he especially couldn't accept
Christian Ponder as his long-term QB.
The Vikings had a choice. Percy Harvin or Christian Ponder? Only time
will tell if they made the right one, but at least you know there is some
conviction behind this choice.
In terms of potential value, I think the Seahawks got fleeced by Rick
Spielman. That opinion won't be finalized for a year or two when we find
out what the Vikings do with their acquired draft picks, but for now, I
think Spielman made the most of a bad situation.
Good luck Percy! When we face you in the future I hope Blair Walsh just kicks it out of the end zone.
(Weird sports fact: On March 11th, 1999 the Minnesota Timberwolves dealt
budding star and malcontent Stephon Marbury to the New Jersey Nets for
Terrell Brandon's aging knees and a 1st round draft pick. If the
correlation between that trade and this one goes any deeper, you will
find Percy Harvin playing for the XianJing Dragons in about 10 years. At
least they don't drug test Chinese athletes.)
There you have it, folks! The offseason begins with a bang here at Ten & Six! Percy Harvin: Out! Rick Spielman: Savvy! Mike Otto: Succinct!
As you can probably imagine, Mike will be joining us throughout the NFL offseason to discuss major and minor moves made by The Purple. Until then be sure to follow him on Twitter (@SwervinTaters) for pigskin rantings and ravings. He can also be found right here on Newest Industry as on our weekly news wrap-up Trendsetting.
For more Newest Industry be sure to give us a follow on Twitter (@NewestIndustry1) to stay up on all the work being done by our contributors. More importantly, we have a Facebook page here. Trivial as it seems, stopping by and giving us a "Like" is a free & legitimate way to support the blog.
Helllooooo football fans! Welcome back to Ten & Six with the one, the only, the inimitable Mike Otto. If you're new to the blog, Mike is our resident football expert. He's also a diehard Vikings fan since the day he could spell "Purple."
This week Mike will be breaking down last week's loss to the Washington Redskins and looking ahead to tomorrow's game against the Cardinals right here at the Hubert H. Humphrey Metrodome. That's right, the HHH Metrodome. Until the Mall Of America cuts Mike a check, that will stay its name on this blog.
However, before he wades neck deep into The Purple, Mike's going to give us his picks for the rest of the league. So far this season Mike's racked up a record of 58-50. It's also been determined that he controls the fate of the Saints, Chargers, and Browns. Also, based on his play, Josh Freeman's goal in life is to make Mike look like a fool.
(Editor's Note: Mike is currently 59-50 after Thursday night's 49ers victory. Scroll down to have a look at that pick.) Anyway, enough of this rabble. Michael! Talk to us!
Welcome back, football fans!
Tough week for my picks, which fell to 6-8 after two spectacular weeks
It was a tough week for The Purple as well, with their three game win streak coming to an end at FedEx Field with a 38-26 loss to the Redskins.
Ultimately, their demise came in the 1st quarter in which they were dominating, oddly enough, but failed to score touchdowns on 3 ocnsecutive trips to the red zone. Needless to say, if those three drives end in touchdowns it's a whole different game.
On the bright side, Christian Ponder again showed his 4th quarter comback potential and who knows what happens in the freak that is Robert Griffin III (Can we all just start calling him "Bob?") doesn't abuse a Vikings all-out blitz for a 76 yard dagger of a touchdown run.
I am impressed with Ponder's performance when forced to pass every down for an entire half of football. Regardless, playing from behind is not a good thing for the Vikings because they are forced to become one-dimensional. Phasing out the best running back in the NFL is not a recipe for success.
In the end, though, all of Christian Ponder's gaudy passing stats were worthless. The Vikings were daggered in the 4th by the rookie freak himself, Bob III.
There is a long history of dual-threat quarterbacks daggering the Vikings with their legs. First, it was Steve Young. Then The Dog Murderer, Michael Vick, took his turn. Finally, the freak himself Bob III did his dance last Sunday.
Which one is the best/saddest? Watch these clips and vote on the right side of the page. Yay history!
Now, on to this week's picks.
Dallas (2-3) at Carolina (1-4)
The Cowboys can't even win a game when they play better than the other team! Lil' Dezzy Bryant had a great game only to drop what would have been the game-tying two point conversion. The Cowboys are cursed. You get a great game from your QB, RB, & WR's, play better than the opposing team, and still lose.
Tony Romo, for whatever reason, cannot take this team to the promised land. Now now, not ever.
The Panthers didn't lose last week, mainly because they didn't play. I'd like to suggest an addition to Newton's Laws Of Physics. Law #4: For every positive rookie season their shall be an equal and opposite negative sophomore season to match it.
Cam Newton everybody! Re-writing the laws of the universe one turnover at a time! Cowboys win 27-17 (one of the 7 wins they will tally this year).
Tennessee (2-4) at Buffalo (3-3)
Are the Titans better than everyone thought? Naw, probably not.
Ryan Fitzpatrick must be a conservationist, as he releases quite a few ducks every Sunday! (Rim shot, please)
In what certainly will be a battle of noodle arm quarterbacks, I see Fitzpatrick noodling a little better the the old noodle himself, Matt Hasselbeck. Get out the colander, it's noodles galore! Bills win 17-16.
Cleveland (1-5) at Indianapolis (2-3)
The Weed Whacker did it! Yes, Brandon Weeden won a football game for his Cleveland Browns. All he needed was for me to believe in him!
That's right, I am officially declaring my predictions as the deciding factor in Cleveland Browns games. For every Browns game I predict incorrectly, I will eat a bite of cat food. Promise.
I think we need to ask the guys with horseshoes on their helmets what happened to Chuckstrong? You got blown out by the Jets?!? Ugly stuff! They won't lose at home to the Browns. Colts roll to victory 31-21. Chuckstrong! Don't make me take food outta Doug's mouth!
(Editor's Note: This is Mike's cat Doug. If you can't tell by his body language, he's also a lifelong Vikings fan. The only thing he loves more than The Purple, though, is his food. Keep doing what you do, Brandon Weeden.)
Green Bay (3-3) at St. Louis (3-3)
I was wrong. I wanted to be right so bad. I said the Texans would put up 42 points last week. Instead, the Packers did.
Aaron Rodgers is a big enough prick to "shhh" his "critics" in his post-game interview. News flash, dickhead, even if you sneak into the playoffs, you aren't going anywhere if you can't run the ball and play defense.
It's about time Mr. Rodgers played like the best quarterback in the NFL. He's all the residents of Green Bay have... well, him and rampant obesity. Congratu-fucking-lations you fat dumb fucks! Packers win 28-17.
Washington (3-3) at New York Giants (4-2)
What about Bob? The Third? Yes, last week the Vikings played the role of Richard Dreyfuss and RG III was Bill Murray. Bob III drove The Purple to insanity and then married their daughter at the end of the game.
OK, it wasn't exactly the same, but it was maddening nonetheless.
The Giants dismantled the Niners in their NFC Championship rematch. Eli & those Giants might be the newest "best team in the NFL," but it's going to be a tough win this week. Close game, but the Giants win 27-26.
New Orleans (1-4) at Tampa Bay (2-3)
The first four weeks of the year I picked the Saints to win and they lost. Week 5 I predicted the Saints to lose and they won! What the hell?!?
Maybe the Saints found out all the horrible things I said about their squad after the '09 NFC Championship game. More likely is the fact that, outside of Drew Brees, the Saints are just terrible and only capable of beating the most inept of teams (Enter: The San Diego Chargers).
Josh Freeman, I know we've had our differences. I know you hate me for comparing you to flaming car wreckage from time to time. But please, try not to fuck me over this weekend. Bucs win 27-20.
Baltimore (5-1) at Houston (5-1)
The Ravens not only lost starting cornerback Ladarius Webb for the year, they also lost starting Entry Dance Specialist and team captain Ray Lewis.
Some are speculating the we've seen Ray-Ray play his last down as a Raven. If that's the case, the rest of the Ravens should honor him by getting to Houston in the trunk of their buddies' cars, preferably to avoid prosecution for something they didn't actually do. It's a craazzzy world!
The Texans really let me down last week. Their failures brought back the Smug Aaron Rodgers that I hate so much. Damn you! Damn you to hell! Texans bounce back with a 31-20 win.
Jacksonville (1-4) at Oakland (1-4)
Who cares? Does anybody care? Does anybody in California or Florida even care? Didn't think so.
In the NFL's latest edition of the "Who Gives A Fuck Bowl?," the Jags travel to Oakland and let's just hope no one gets stabbed in the parking lot after the game. Oakland wins 17-13.
New York Jets (3-3) at New England (3-3)
Bill Belichick needs to break out the spyware! Rex Ryan needs to break out the Ab-Flexor!
Sources close to The Jets report that Mark Sanchez wakes up every morning, turns all the lights off in house, and whispers the words "Elite NFL Quarterback" five times in the hopes he becomes one. Hell, it's worth a shot.
Coincidentally, Tim Tebow does the same thing, except he whispers the words, "a penis that works." Sad days in New York. Pats win 35-10.
Pittsburgh ()2-3 at Cincinnati (3-3)
The Cincinnati Bungles lost the Battle For Ohio! The Browns?!? You lost to THE BROWNS!! That is just sad.
Oh, the things I would do to see A.J. Green in a purple jersey.
Pittsburgh is old and slow. Troy Polamalu can't walk to the corner store for a gallon of milk without straining his calf. James Harrison's eyes are more crossed than ever before. Big Ben Rapistberger is playing better than ever, but he just can't do it alone. Even his inspirational, "You have to grope with your heart AND mind" pre-game speech seemingly fell on deaf ears.
I'm picking the Bengals for a big upset. They triumph at home 24-21.
Detroit (2-3) at Chicago (4-1)
With a win, the Bears can maintain sole possession of first place in the NFC North. I hate living in a world where Jay Cutler is first at anything but being an asshole. Be the best asshole you can be, Jay.
It'll be fun to see if Cutler can make it through a whole game without pouting like a sixteen year old girl. I doubt he can. I've heard J-Cuts is a middle-of-the-monther.
Detroit is over-matched, but I think they can make this one close. Bears win 27-24.
Boom! Picks on picks on picks! Thanks for that, Michael. Now, on to The Purple:
The Vikings suffered a tough defeat last week, but their fast start this season makes the loss easier to accept and overcome.
This is the first "must win" game for the Vikings this season. Playoff teams bounce right back from losses, especially at home against the league's worst offense.
After this week one of these 4-2 teams will be classified as a "pretender," the other a "contender." Obviously the Vikings would rather be the latter.
Arizona's defense is as stout as their offense is anemic. Kevin Kolb won't play this weekend, but in my opinion, he and John Skelton are the same person. Let's not forget, Skelton started the Cardinals first game before he was injured. If the Cardinals quarterbacks score any 76 yard rushing touchdowns this week I'll leave town.
If the Vikings can put up TOUCHDOWNS early, they will increase their chances of winning dramtically. None of this drives-stalling-in-the-red-zone bullshit.
Hey, speaking of bullshit, let's take a look at the positives and negatives of last week As always, I'll start with the positives:
-CP7 (Second Half Version): He had a very rough 2nd quarter and single-handedly put the Vikings in a hole. When faced with playing from behind and forced to throw almost every down he got the job done and brought us to the brink of an epic comeback.
His final stat line: 35-52, 335 yards, 2 TD's, & 2 INT's. Prestty solid. Unfortunately, that's not a recipe for a Vikings victory.
-Antoine Winfield: Had a spectacular pick deep in Redskins territory (that the Vikings failed to put in the endzone). Regardless, "Winny" is defying Father Time and is on pace for 5-6 interceptions this season. Let's not waste this awesome season Antoine is giving us!
-Adrian Peterson: Left the game with both ACL's intact! Sometimes it's the small victories.
And, sadly, the negatives.
-Red Zone Efficiency: The Vikings made it to the red zone 7 times and only scored 2 touchdowns. Three 1st quarter drives to the red zone ended in field goals and, if you would have ended with touchdowns, the Vikings undoubtedly win that game. Would, shoulda, coulda...
-Interior Offensive Line: I specify "interior" because Kalil and Loadholt played a pretty good game. Right guard is the Vikings most visible weakness on the line and it showed last Sunday. Ponder faced constant pressure up the middle and you could see it heavily affecting his pocked poise (especially during the 2nd quarter). I'm not exactly sure what a "Brandon Fusco" is, but I know it isn't a decent right guard.
-Madieu Williams Got A Fucking Pick Six!: Fucking MADIEU WILLIAMS! Vikings fans know firsthand how terrible he is. That was fucking embarrassing.
-Devin Aromashadu: 'Shadu should not be allowed to run "go" routes. He is decent deep, down the middle of the field, but can't make adjustments to the ball in the air and also can't win jump balls. He was lucky to draw that pass interference call. This team needs Jerome Simpson desperately.
ARIZONA CARDINALS (4-2) at MINNESOTA VIKINGS (4-2)
Three Keys To A Vikings Victory:
Key #1: Score points. Touchdown points.
The Cardinals do not have the offense to play from behind successfully. In my perfect world the Vikings would score two 1st quarter touchdowns and never look back. That probably won't happen against a stout Cardinals defense. Regardless, The Purple must finish red zone tirps with touchdowns. A 14 point halftime lead would hold up for a victory.
Key #2: Target Jerome Simpson downfield.
The Vikings are going to see a lot of 8- and 9-man fronts unless we can burn the Cardinals once or twice deep. Jerome Simpson will have some opportunities, as I'm sure Patrick Peterson will be shadowing Percy Harvin most of the game.
Key #3: Please, please double Larry Fitzgerald all game.
Larry is the only guy the Cards have who is a threat to take it the distance at any time. I'm pretty, pretty, prettttyyy sure that if the Vikings keep Larry out of the endzone they will win the game.
Two Matchups To Watch:
Matchup #1: Percy Harvin vs. Patrick Peterson
Not only will they face off against each other on passing downs, they are both dynamic kick returners with the ability to change momentum in the game whenever they field a kick. As two of the league's premiere athletes, it's going to be fun to watch this all day.
If either one of these guys scores a touchdown in the return game, it will go a long way toward their team winning.
Matchup #2: The Ghost Of Boomer Esiason vs. Vikings players and fans
Boomer never seemed to like, or give much credit to, the Vikings when he was alive. Maybe it's because the Vikings always destroyed him when he came to The Dome.
I remember a game I went to as a young boy. Boomerand the Cards were in town to play the beloved Purple. Boomer threw four picks and the Vikings put up 40-something points in the victory. The home crowd taunted Boomer mercilessly the entire game and I, as a 5 year old, remember the pure joy I felt chanting, "Boooooooomer" over and over again.
Now that Boomer is dead, will his noodle-armed ghost come back to The Dome on Sunday to trip our players and spill our beers? Let's hope not. Rest in peace, Boomer. You gave me some good memories.
(Editor's Note: Boomer Esiason is not actually dead. He's only dead on the inside.)
Mike's All Purpose Flour Lock Of The Week:
Antoine Winfield, CB, Your Minnesota Vikings
That interception last week was sick and it was 'Toine's second straight game with a pick. The Vikings finally have the luxury of keeping Antoine fresh because Josh Robinson and Chris Cook have been playing solid football. I think 'Toine keeps his hot streak going and snatches another interception to go along with 8 tackles (2 for loss).
FINAL TAKES
The Vikings need this one like they need air in their lungs. The thing is, the Cardinals need it just as much. Win and all the mistakes from last week are forgotten. Lose and they all get magnified.
This has the makings of a physical, black & blue slugfest. The more physical the Vikings offensive line is this week the better chance they have of winning this game.
Ponder still seems to get a little flustered when under constant pressure, so it's important to keep him comfortable. I fully expect the offensive line to have a bounce-back week in pass protection.
Lots of interesting matchups to watch and I think it should be a great game. There is no reason the Vikings shouldn't win this game if they execute and finish drives with touchdowns.
FINAL SCORE:
Minnesota Vikings: 20
Arizona Cardinals: 16
Woooooooo!
There you have it folks, straight from the horse's mouth. If the Vikes get in the endzone this week they'll be looking at 5-2 and that looks pretty damn good from here.
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