Ten & Six With Mike Otto: Week 17 - Green Bay Packers At Minnesota Vikings (Sunday Bonus!)

They on some nonsense, we on some non-stop!

Well hello again, football fans!  Welcome to a special bonus edition of Ten & Six!

Now, we did something a little bit different this week.  As you all probably know by now, the Vikings and Packer faced off this afternoon with a Vikings playoff berth on the line.  Sadly, our usual football commentator Mike Otto was tied up at work and was unable to watch the game.  Bad times, as it was an incredible game and he certainly would have enjoyed it.

Fortunately, TCDroogsma was not working.  Since he was going to tune in anyway we asked him to keep a running diary of the game.  Keep an eye out for cameos from TCDroogsma's father and Mike Otto via text message.

So, TCDroogsma, rewind it back for us.

3:15 – Hey everybody! Welcome to my attempt to co-opt Mike's Ten & Six column! It's not every year that your beloved football team takes on their most hated rival in the last game of the season with a berth in the playoffs on the line. In fact, now that I think of it, I'm not sure that happens in any season.

Regardless, I figured it was important to commemorate the occasion by breaking out a running game diary for Week 17. Packers! Vikings! Metrodome! Playoff implications! Somewhat outdated internet gimmicks! Let's do it!

3:18 – For the record, I'm watching the game at my girlfriend's house with her pupper.  We're feasting on sesame tofu and Summits.  I wish every day was like Sunday.

3:19 – Jimmy Johnson: “Ponder has played... better the last few weeks. If he can be efficient the Vikings can win.” It's a recession, man! Efficient is the best we can hope for out of our quarterback.

3:20 – Howie Long: “Adrian Peterson put this football team on his back.” Doe! My leg hurts, but it doesn't matter!

3:22 – I should probably mention that I'm running on 5 cups of coffee after a day of work and 3 hours of sleep. This diary definitely has the potential to go off the rails.

And on that note: Summit!

Figured it was important to stay All 'Sota Everything when it came to the drinks this afternoon.

3:23 – We got Buck & Aikman! Err... great?

3:24 – My girlfriend: “Troy Aikman! That's a name I recognize! God, his hair's so shiny.” She's kind of new at this.

3:25 – Pam Oliver: “...............................” (footage of roof collapse, footage of AP's injury) “.............” Good contribution, Pam.

3:25 – Text from Mike Otto: “Vikings get the ball first, the game's over.”

3:25 – Text from Mike Otto: “Give us the trophy.”

3:25 - Here we go! Kickoff! Marcus Sherels past the 20!

3:26 – Joe Buck: “Understand, we've had some audio difficulties already.” Hadn't noticed.

3:27 – Ponder's 1 for 1 passing! First down, son!

3:28 – Buck: “The guy they love here in Minneapolis carries it for a first down.” You don't speak for us, Joe Buck! But, yeah, we do love him.

3:30 – Third down conversion! Jerome Simpson has an awful lot of swagger for someone who's essentially useless. He's like the Meek Mill of the Vikings.

3:31 – Ponder audible. This can't be good... Nope, throws it away.

3:32 – Here we go, Blair Walsh from 54...... Good! Blair Walsh for MVP! 3-0 Vikings!

3:35 – Thank god Randall Cobb is hurt. That guy is on the Mt. Rushmore of Guys Who Terrify Minnesota Sports Fans (in between Joe Sakic and Frank Thomas).

3:37 – Toyota's slogan is “Let's Go Places.” Advertising team, I like you, and that's why it's so hard to cut you, but you're cut.

3:38 – How is Mike McCarthy 10-3 all time against the Vikings? He's the NFL coach most likely to injure himself sneezing.

3:39 – Three and out! Mike Otto predicted the Vikes would go up 10-0 and never look back.... just sayin'...

3:42 - Jesus Christ, Ponder! Just take the sack!

3:42 – Mike McCarthy is challenging that the incomplete pass was actually a Clay Matthews sack. So basically, Mike McCarthy is risking a timeout 5 minutes into the game to try to move the Vikings from 2^nd and 10 to 2^nd & 15. Somewhere Bill Barnwell just hammered out 400 words.

I mean, McCarthy's going to get the call, but it's a risk/reward proposition. Are those 5 yards really worth potentially losing a timeout at this point in the game?

3:45 – Congratulation, Shamu, you won the challenge. C'mon, Vikes, get the first down on this play.

3:46 – Aikman: “I know Vikings fans are tired of hearing about how the Vikings are better at rushing the ball than throwing the ball...” And yet, here we are...

3:47 – Toby for the first down! Run, Toby, run!

3:47 – Do we really need gamebreaks for this Broncos/Chiefs game! Let me save you sometime, "Let's go to Denver.... It's Peyton Manning to Eric Decker for the touchdown!  The Broncos now lead 49-3 and Romeo Crennel had to leave the game after eating too much peanut butter on the sideline."

3:48 – All Day for 22! Aikman: “This is one of those backs that you can't just throw a should into him and think he'll go down.” Clearly, Troy's done his homework.

3:49 – Touchdown AP!!!!! 10-0!! Paging Nostra-Otto...

3:53 – Fox graphics just showed us that AP is now 147 yards away from Dickerson's record. Settle in, folks, you're about to witness history.

3:54 – Text from Mike: “I am so damn good it hurts. AP BAAAAABY!!”

3:55 – Three and out for the Packers!

3:56 – A montage of all the 2,000 yard backs set to Nas' “The World Is Mine?” Fox brought the A game today.

3:58 – Vikings go for it on 4^th and 1 and midfield and AP gets it because, well, he's Adrian fucking Peterson.

3:59 – Troy Aikman is comparing Adrian Peterson to Emmitt Smith. It's completely warranted.

4:00 – Another third down conversion! Ponder that!

4:01 – Aikman: “We've seen it all year long, if you give Christian Ponder a lane to run he's going to take it.” And sometimes he'll just start running regardless.

4:02 – End of the 1^st Quarter: Vikings: 10, Packers: 0. Vikings driving! Positivity abounds!

4:04 – Blair Walsh from 37.... Good! 13-0! Get some!

4:05 – Texas A&M is playing Oklahoma this Friday in the Cotton Bowl?!? But every other channel on TV will be showing something else, right? Thank god, that was a close one.

4:07 – Goddamnit! Jeremy Ross is not Randall Cobb!

4:08 – Let the record show that it was with 14:00 left in the second quarter that the Packers got their first first down.

4:08 – And Rodgers is promptly sacked by Jared Allen on first down! Loss of 12!

4:09 – Delay of game wipes away a big completion to Jermichael Finley! Holy hell, some days you get the breaks. At least that's the cliché. As a Vikings fan I have no idea if that's true.

4:11 - 4^th & 11 for the Packers on the Vikings 41.... time out. C'mon, Shamu! Pull the trigger!

4:12 – I'll bet it's fun playing against Cam Newton on his Xbox. Especially when he tosses your controller 5 feet over your head.

4:13 – Text from Mike: “Go for it, McCarthy. I fucking dare you.”

4:14 – And boom goes the punt... (Copyright: Gregggggg)

4:16 – Text from my dad: “Thanks to Fox glitches we get Pam Oliver the best way: Seen but not heard.”

4:18 – Three and out for the Vikes. Drat!

4:18 - GODDAMNIT! JEREMY ROSS IS NOT RANDALL COBB!!

4:19 – DuJuan Harris? Jeremy Ross? Who the fuck ARE these people?

4:21 – Damn! First third down conversion for the Packers. Momentum's shifting just a bit here....

4:22 – Girlfriend: “What's a down?”

4:25 – Third and goal and the Packers take a time out.

4:28 – Pass to Finley is complete. Might be a touchdown. Definitely a penalty against Erin Henderson.

4:29 – Alright, no touchdown, penalty enforced, first and goal from the 3. Love the fact that McCarthy couldn't challenge because if he was wrong he would be out of challenges. Why would he be out of challenges? Because he pissed away that one earlier! Even I know this shit! He's a professional football coach!

4:30 – Jennings drops the ball in the end zone! No catch! Timeout: Packers.

4:31 – Text from Dad: “Apparently Rodgers thinks you get 11 timeouts per half.”

4:31 - 2^nd and goal.... incompletion! Rodgers throws it away!

4:32 - 3^rd and goal... Damnit. Touchdown. God, I hate Aaron Rodgers.

4:36 – Big return from Sherels. I wonder if Percy Harvin is still alive?

4:38 – WHAAAATTTTTT!!!! That was the strangest catch I've seen in ages! Jarius Wright comes down with it!

4:38 – Ahahahaha! That's not a catch, but McCarthy can't do anything about it because Rodger's burned up all his timeouts!!!!

4:40 – Mike McCarthy's really making his case for stepping into Andy Reid's now departed shoes as the definitive, “I'm a fat yutz who has no idea how to manage a game” coach.

4:42 – Nice grab by Jerome Simpson on an out. How is this drive still happening?:

4:42 – Adrian Peterson abuses Morgan Burnett and turns it into 18 yards! 1st and goal from the 8.

4:43 – TOUCHDOWN!!!!!!! JARIUS WRIGHT!!!!!!! GREATEST DRIVE EVER!!!!! 20-7 VIKES!!!!

4:46 – Packers have 1:07 and no timeouts starting at their own 20.

4:47 – Buck: “Remember, the Packers do have a shaky kicker right now in Mason Crosby.” Haha!  That's right, they do have a shaky kicker don't they?

4:49 – Crosby from 51... good. Halftime. 20-10 Vikings

4:54 – I'm still nervous about this one. A lot of things went right that half and the Packers looked like they were gaining some momentum. Now they get the ball to start the second half. Maybe this is just years of tortured Vikings fan talking, but we'll see...

4:59 – Text from Mike: “I gotta good feeling. AP is 11 from 2000 and 117 from Dickerson. It's gonna happen.”

5:03 – Pam Oliver reports that Aaron Rodgers thinks the officials are taking too long to spot the ball. Just go fuck yourself, Aaron Rodgers.

5:04 – Three plays into the half and the Packers are into Vikings territory.

5:05 – Rodgers trips over his own lineman for a loss of three on first down and then a false start. Maybe the Vikings are going to get the bounces today.

5:06 – 45 yards and two colliding Vikings later... Maybe they aren't going to get the bounces.

5:08 – And Greg Jennings hauls in the wide open touchdown pass as three Vikings point at each other. 20-17 Vikings.

5:09 – It is not a coincidence that the wheels started coming off now that Antoine Winfield is stuck on the sideline. This may get worse before it gets better.

5:11 – Josh Robinson returns the kickoff? Josh Robinson?

5:11 – All Day goes for 20 on first down. Hello 2,000 yard mark!

5:13 – Buck: “Not a lot of teams should be able to get more out of play-action than the Vikings.” I'm glad Joe's here to explain these things to us.

5:14 – Three and out. Fuck.

5:16 - “Stars In Danger: The High Dive. A special two-hour event on Fox.” Because being responsible for American Dad just wasn't enough.

5:17 - Jasper Brinkley takes a brutal Roughing The Passer penalty after Aaron Rodgers throws the ball away. 15 yards and first down. Oh no...

5:18 – Text from Dad.: “Without a turnover we're beat.” That's 53 years of Viking fan talking.

5:20 - 3^rd and 7 and... fumble!!!!!!! Vikings recover at the 50!!!!!!! Dad calls it!

5:21 – Girlfriend: “Haha! The ball wasn't in his hands but he moved his hands like he was holding the ball.” That is indeed what happened.

5:23 – Ponder to Simpson for 20 yards! And it was a bullet! The fuck?

5:24 – Buck: “That's a deep play... by Vikings standards.” Joe Buck: Sassy! (Copyright: Phil Hartman)

5:26 – Ponder to... Jerome Felton?!? Looks like Leslie was saving a few tricks for Week 17.

5:27 – Oh, God no! Adrian Peterson knee was down before he dropped the ball! I swear to everything holy, he was down!!!!

5:30 – The fuck is Loadholt doing taking an Unsportsmanlike Conduct penalty at the end of a fumble that his team, supposedly, lost. That gets enforced regardless of the turnover review. LOADHOLT!!!

5:31 – Troy Aikman seems very impressed by his stat guys ability to do math. Do we have Troy's baseline tests somewhere?

5:32 – Second and 27 and Adrian Peterson takes it 28 yards for first and goal!!!! 64 yards to go to get the record. More importantly, 8 yards for a huge touchdown.

5:34 – Looks like finally caught up to Jerome Simpson. I hope they have his baseline test somewhere too.

5:36 – Text from Mike: “What's that I feel? Could it be a play-action pass to Rudolph?”

5:37 - 3^rd and goal and.... out of bounds. Wait! Flags! Holding on the Packers! First and goal from the two!

5:37 – TOUCHDOWN!!!!! PONDER-TO-PETERSON!!!!!!! SKOLLLL!!!!!!!

5:41 – Text from Mike: “2 TD's for young Mr. Ponder? No INT's? In the biggest game of his young career? Silencing some doubters today through 3 quarters!!! Whatta you think of my quarterback now!”

5:43 - Aikman: “Sorry, Joe. I've played some big games in this stadium, some playoff games, and when the crowd gets behind this team, it feels like you're playing against 15 defenders.” It should be noted that Troy routinely saw 14 defenders on the field.

5:44 – Jordy Nelson for 72 yards! Noooo!!!!!

5:44 – James Jones fumbles at the goal.line? Or scores a touchdown? Either way, it resulted in Aaron Rodgers sprinting over to the sideline and yelling. God, how do you Green Bay fans sleep and night cheering for this jackass?

5:47 – Oh god! Jordy Nelson just went out of his way to try to hide the fact that his fucking idiot of a coach threw the challenge flag illegally. Seriously, this is a NFL head coach? What a joke.

5:49 – It's a touchdown?!? AND a 15 yard penalty!?! God, I hate being a Vikings fan. 27-24 Vikings

5:49 – Aikman: “There's a host of people in Detroit, Michigan upset at this ruling after Jim Schwartz on Thanksgiving.” No, they're mostly upset because their boats are on fire and their houses have been stripped of copper.

5:51 – Alright, Pereira pretty much just kicked Detroit in the teeth. “It's most important that we get the call right. Penalize the coach 15 yards, but get the call right. It's a stupid rule anyway.” It's been six weeks since Thanksgiving! Six weeks! It was the rule then but not now?!?

5:53 – Wait, Adrian Peterson had knee surgery in the offseason? This is the first I've heard about it.

5:55 – Three and out... Ross is bringing this punt all the way back, isn't he?

5:56 – After a Facemasking penalty the Packers get the ball at their 49. The Vikings are all kinds of screwed.

5:57 – Text from Dad: “I'm very scared.” Couldn't agree more.

6:00 – 3^rd and 5 and James Jones runs six yards, turns around, and catches a pass. Football is so easy.

6:01 – Antoine Winfield needs to teach Marcus Sherels how to make open field tackles... and cover receivers... and read plays... and blitz....

6:02 – 3^rd and 4... incomplete. Thank God. Bring on the Mason Crosby show.

6:03 – 40 yard try... good. 27-27. The season is suddenly 12:21 long.

6:06 – Damn! Eric Dickerson had 40 more carries than AP? And he hadn't torn his knee up the year before? Interesting.

6:08 – 65 yards to Jarius Wright on first down! Where did that arm come from!?!?! Best pass of Ponder's career.

6:09 – All Day with the first down! First and goal, baby!

6:09 – GODDAMNIT LOADHOLT!!!!!!! That's 25 yards you've cost your squad today!!!!!! First and goal from the 12.

6:10 – Wow, A.J. Hawk is still in the league? That's surprising.

6:11 – Second and goal and Ponder overthrows Jenkins in the end zone.

6:12 – Aikman: “Those are the plays that make a difference between winning a game and losing.” Buck: “Or making the playoffs or not.” Shut up, shut up, shut up!

6:13 – Third and goal goes nowhere but Tramon Williams takes a cheap shot at Simpson's head away from the play! The same Simpson who looked concussed earlier. And the same Tramon William who was fined for a helmet-to-helmet on the back of John Carlson's head a few weeks ago. Stay classy, Tramon. Regardless, 1^st and goal!!!!

6:15 – Alright, third and goal... please... please... please... YES!!!!!!!! TOUCHDOWN!!!! MICHAEL FUCKING JENKINS!!!!! PULL THOSE 84 JERSEYS OUT!!!!!! 34-27!!!

6:16 – Aikman: “When Ponder released this ball I thought for sure it was an interception.” Nah, doe. NAH!

6:16 – And Fox goes to commercial playing “Jungle Love!” ALL! SOTA! EVERYTHING!

6:17 – Text from Dad: “Ponder is playing with a horseshoe up his butt.” Good! He had to try something!

6:18 – 1^st and 10 Packers from their own 22.

6:19 - 1^st and 10 Packers from their own 34

6:20 – SACK! EVERSON GRIFFIN!!!! That's 5 sacks today for your Vikings!

6:20 – False start! 3^rd and 20!

6:20 – Get a stop... get a stop... get a stop... 19 yard completion!?! Odd.

6:22 – Somehow the Packers convert the fourth down. Damnit.

6:23 - 3^rd and 4 from the Vikes 46... get a stop... get a stop... DAMNIT!!!! Threads the needle to Jennings!!!! Don't you do this to me again, Vikings!!!!

6:24 – Buck: “Every Chicago Bear and every Chicago Bears fan is hoping for the Packers to end this drive in the end zone.” Oh fuck you, everybody. Just fuck you.

6:26 – Pass interference on A.J. Jefferson. Evidently Rodgers has realized he can pick on the young man. First and goal from the 2.

6:26 – Touchdown Jordy Nelson. 34-34. I need 20 more beers.

6:29 – And just like that, the season is 2:51 seconds long.

6:30 - “Boy, let's hope the Vikings don't score too soon and leave Rodgers too much time.” - Nobody

6:31 – Dear Football Gods, I don't ask for much, and lord knows that's exactly what I've received, but please, find it in your hearts to deliver the Vikings a victory in this game. Let them get thrashed next week, I don't care. Just let them have this one.

6:32 – Text From Mike: “Time for a statement drive. 45 from Dickerson. Will CP7 notch his first 4 TD game? Ahhhhhh FUCK!!” I admire the homey's confidence. I don't feel so good.

6:34 – 3^rd & 11. Two minute warning. Big thanks to Fox for reminding us as they went to commercial that every Packers fan is uglier than the ugliest fan of every other team in the NFL. Seriously, get surgery.

6:34 – Here we go, 3^rd & 11.... Jenkins again!!!!! 25 yards and the first down!!!

6:37 – Not to bring up Mike's predictions again, but at the beginning of the year he said most of the Vikings games would be close and many would come down to Blair Walsh. Who knew that the whole season may come down to the rookie kicker?

6:38 – Text From Mike: “Ponder is doing this! He CAN handle the big spot!!” God bless your optimism, Mikey.

6:40 – AP for the first down and Joe Buck announces that they are now in Blair Walsh's range. Come on, boys, come on!

6:41 – Text from Dad: “Having a bad Gary Anderson flashback.” Well there's no such things as a GOOD Gary Anderson flashback now is there?!?!

6:42 – ALLLLLL DAAAAAYYYYYY!!!!!! AP takes it to the 15!!!!!!

6:43 – Blair Walsh from 29 and the win... c'mon... c'mon... c'mon....

6:43 – You can't ice Blair Walsh! Blair Walsh will ice you!

6:44 – Here we go... here we go... here we go... GOOOOOOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SKOLLLLLL VIKINGS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! PLAYOFFS, BABY!!!!! JAY CUTLER, SUCK IT!!!!!! AARON RODGERS, SUCK IT!!!!!!! MATT STAFFORD, it gets better, dude. Keep your head up. CHICAGO, SUCK IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GREEN BAY, SUCK IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

6:47 – Sorry, I got a little out of hand there. I didn't say anything I didn't mean, but I probably could have phrased it better..

6:52 – SUCK IT, CHICAGO!!!!!!!!!!!!! SUCK IT, GREEN BAY!!!!!!!!!!!

6:53 – Yeah, that's much better. All things considered, that is by far the best football game I've seen since the '09 NFC Championship Game. And for the first time in a while The Purple came through!!! Seriously, I feel like going downtown and hooking up with the hordes leaving the Dome! Everything is purple! Everything is purple!

Well there you go, everybody!  TCDroogsma's drunk and excited.  Mike Otto's Ten & Six prediction came true.  And, most importantly, the Vikings are off to Lambeau next week to meet the Packers for the third time this season.  Gee, wonder if the Vikings have ever won a playoff game at Lambeau field in spectacular, notorious, unforgettable fashion before?  We'll have to look that up.

Ten & Six will return later this week with Mike's recap of this game and his breakdown of next week's game (plus his playoff picks).  Gotta ride the hot hand.

For more TCDroogsma be sure to give him a follow on Twitter (@TCDroogsma).  Might want to wait until tomorrow to let him get his Vikings tweets out of his system.

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